The Dangers of Being a Smam with Sharp Tools

Okay, guys, let's face it.  I should not be allowed to hold sharp objects EVER.

Today I almost sliced off my right index finger with my rotary cutter.

While cleaning the blade, I subconsciously decided to play chicken with the sharp, round knife.

Surprise, surprise! 

I lost.....

The big mean blade won.

I also tend to burn my fingertips while ironing.  I like to touch the SUPER HOT fabric without thinking about it.

Because of this incident, I have to wait for my finger to heal before I can attempt to start cutting fabric again, as I'm right handed and I NEED that finger a lot to cut and sew and all that other good stuff.  Maybe like a week.  This will also give me time to get into my school routine.  Because school starts back tomorrow morning.  Joy.  

Good night, everybody!  

Ironing

Bet you thought I forgot about you.  WRONG!!!!  I've just been SUPER lazy.

I have realized that I really like to iron.  I don't know if it's a good stress reliever or what, but I think I could iron for hours.  Which I have done!  I have taken to sitting in my floor with a tabletop ironing board and an iron.  As a matter of fact, I was just distracted for 20 minutes doing just that.

Did you know that fabric has a mind of its own?  I swear it does!  My seams knew which way they were going to lay.  I had no say in the matter.  Stupid fabric.....  If you can't already tell, I've been pressing seams.  I finally got around to piecing and and sewing and while I still have pieces to cut out and sew together, I decided to get started on what I already have.  I'm pretty excited about it, actually.

I have been procrastinating and now I'm almost out of time.  School starts in a week and I have no money to finish up so I'm job hunting in order to do just that.  I think I should be able to finish the top, though, so that's good!

I feel much better now than I did when I woke up this morning.  I don't know what happened, but I was not in a good mood when I woke up.  I think ironing made me feel better.  Mindless work that needed to be done that everyone else can't mess up.  Because they ALWAYS mess......  lol  Anyway, I hope everyone is having a great day!

Gabriel Sean Griffis

On Tuesday, July 12, my best friend from childhood gave birth to the most beautiful baby boy ever.  Gabriel Sean Griffis was born via c-section after 18 hours of labor, weighing in a 9 lbs, 9 oz.

Gabe got his name from his mommy and daddy's middle names.  He is precious and I will always love this little boy and his mommy and daddy.  His godmother, Aimee, was with Felicia the whole time, up till delivery because only Dillon got to go back to OR with Felicia.  Every one is doing well and gets to go home on Friday.  Love you guys!

What the Hell is a Hufflepuff?!

It is NO secret that I am a Harry Potter Fan Girl.  That's right, world, I am Harry Potter's BIGGEST FAN.  Take that, all you self proclaimed fan girls.  =)  Really though, I love the Wizarding world and everything to do with it.  It is ALSO no secret that the final installment is hitting theaters at midnight tonight.  I am going with two of my very best friends to see this momentous moment in history as the last movie of my childhood comes to the big screen.

When Harry Potter was in its infancy stages, before I was really old enough to read and understand the books, I tried to read the first one and I hated it.  It was the first book I tried to read and couldn't.  I was in elementary school then but it didn't matter to me.  I hated it.  One summer, as I sat around bored at my mom's house in Kentucky, she suggested I read the HP books.  I scoffed and made fun, but she was insistent, so I read them.  that summer, only four books were out and I wore out those spines.  My step-grandmother had them and I'm fairly certain I actually wore out the fourth books spine.  I was hooked.  Every summer that a new one came out, I was in KY and Carolyn would buy the new one for me.  I would have it read by the end of the day that I got it.  When the seventh book came out, I sat in a room for 8 or 9 hours and did nothing but read.  I cried at the end and every time a person died.  I gasped when the plot twisted.  It was a little bit ridiculous.  But I can't help it.  That's the kind of reader I am.  I get very into it.  That's how you know I like it.

I used to get so absorbed that I would be reading and forget the world.  My stepdad would holler for me and I wouldn't hear him.  He made me jump several feet in the air that first summer.  All he had to do was poke me...

Then Potter Puppet Pals came on youtube and everyone, including myself, loved it.  

A bunch of college kids created A Very Potter Musical, and I was forever changed.  When  A Very Potter Sequel came out, I was waiting on youtube to watch it as they loaded it online.

My friend sent me Wizard People Dear Readers on youtube and I was amused.

I read fanfiction and imagine what my life would be like in the Wizarding world.

I am a nerd.  And I will happily admit it.  I love it though.  I love being this girl.  It makes me happy.  People, especially my boyfriend, make fun of me, but I let it go because I know how awesome it is.

Ashley and Anna came to my house to watch all 7 movies before we go to the premier tonight.  Throughout the movies, we made refrences to all of the above links.  Singing, paraphrasing, ect.  Best.  Night.  Ever.  Until tonight, that is.  I have my wand at the ready and my outfit planned to the T.  It's going to be great.  Don't worry, I'll let you know how it goes.

Technology

I'm a slacker.  Somehow, throughout my life, I have managed to make great grades with last minute work.  I am a procrastinator.  This is no secret to my friends and family, but my teachers would laugh in your face if you told them that not-secret-secret.  I had not done much of anything on my quilt until the day before yesterday, when I finished cutting out trapezoids with the last of my fabric.  I'm still missing a few, but I have 260 of 274.  So I think I'm doing okay.  I was starting to get worried, though, because I knew I would need my sewing machine soon, and I had NO CLUE how to work it.

I made a dress for my English 114 class and every time I used the sewing machine, the bobbin would jam and I was scared that I would break the needle if I kept on the way I was going, so I stopped using it and started sewing by hand.  I have always sewn by hand.  I'm the queen of ripped seams and missing buttons.  I can fix those kinds of things faster than you can say "Hogwarts" and ta-da, they look like new again!  Sewing fabric together from nothing into something is a different story.  Lucky for me, I have a best friend who is a crafting wizard.  She's my savior.

Ashley was staying at my house while my Grandmother went to Savannah with my aunt for her birthday.  While here, I was cutting the rest of my trapeziods and complaining about technology and how it sucks.

This is normal for me.  

It's no secret I constantly complain about technology

and how it keeps us apart though

it's supposed to make us

closer.

Finally I got around to my sewing machine.  "The bobbin jams every time I use it and I just don't get WHY?!?!" Ashley looked up at me from the floor and said "Want me to take a look?"

Indeed I did.  And I'll be damned but she fixed it.  Kindly and patiently she walked me through what was wrong with my settings and the bobbin, explaining how they should be versus how they were.  After that, it was a piece of cake.  I am currently working on keeping my seams straight.  Lucky for me I have a lot of extra fabric so I can practice!  

Frustration

Like so many others, I easily become frustrated.  Even when there is a simple fix for the situation at hand.  It is almost like I enjoy being in a constant state of frustration, but I definitely do not.

While cutting fabric today, my rotary cutter didn't want to cut through the four layers of fabric that has become my template for quick pieces.  The easy solution was to unfold my fabric and cut two layers, which the rotary cutter could easily handle, instead of four.  I, however, decided to try to force the rotary cutter to cut through the thick wad of fabric anyway, which only served to frustrate me more because, of course, it didn't work.

DUH SAM!!!!

Then I received a call from my boyfriend who decided to tell me he would rather go to Charlotte with his room mate than to have dinner with me.  That only made it worse.  That actually made me really angry.

So I decided to break for a moment from fabric squares and inconsiderate men in order to fight the waves of frustration that had begun to wash over me.  Looking back, I only had about 4 hours of sleep last night.  For some reason I didn't go to sleep until after 4:30 a.m. and then I woke up at 8:44 a.m. to take my dog, Blue, out and couldn't go back to sleep.  Then I had to cut the grass in this ridiculous heat because family is coming over this evening.  

And of course I have a migraine to go along with this whole thing.  LOVE those.....

So I think I'm going to take a break from technology and read for a while.  Maybe nap.  When I feel calmer, I will return to my rotary mat and cutter.  Until then, Au Revoir.

Beginning

So far, I have written about writing again, politics, and given a description of myself.  Not much to brag about, ne?  So here goes yet another beginning.  Only this one I fully intend to finish.

This is the beginning of me coming into my own.  I am 20 years old and what do I have to show for it?  Absolutely nothing.  Most people my age are going into their junior year of college, have jobs, healthy relationships, and, pretty much have their lives mapped out.  I, however, am all over the board.  I don't know what I want to do with my life.  Hell, I don't want to grow up at all.  But I guess it's a little late for that.

Here I am, starting my second year at the local community college, convinced I want to be a teacher.  Six months ago I was going to be a nurse.  Six months before that I was on the road to being one of those people stuck in a small town, working at the local Dollar General for the rest of my life, married to the guy who knocked me up.  Thank God I'm not there anymore!  But I'm not that far from it.  I'm living with my grandmother, doing absolutely nothing with my life.  True, I have recently been CNA certified.  And I fully intend to find a job wiping butts all day.  But until then, I babysit every other week and do odd jobs for friends and family.  Recently, I started quilting.  And by recently, I mean I JUST started this evening.

As I sat there this evening cutting fabric, I had a small epiphany.  My life is going absolutely nowhere.  I cannot make a decision to save my life, I am hopelessly codependent, I have very few REAL friends who I keep in contact with on a regular basis, I am a hypocrite, I have NO self esteem, and, I still think like a teenager.  A very YOUNG teenager.  I have decided to utilize my time and sewing efforts into something positive, other than just something to keep my hands busy.  I'm going to use this as a growth and learning experience.  I'm going to contemplate the big questions and really focus on fixing myself.

As a child, I knew exactly what I wanted in life.  I guess we all did as children, but most people grew up and did something with their lives.  I really afraid that in 10 years, I'm going to be in almost the exact situation that my parents were in when I was growing up.  Stuck in a dead end marriage, with no real career or goals past what to make for dinner.  If I end up that way, I won't last long.  I'll die.  As it is, I feel lost and confused most of the time.  I am restless and anxious, angry and frustrated.  ALL THE TIME.  I can't be this person anymore.  I hate myself most days.  I need to change myself, and my goal is to do that through projects that make me think and ask questions.  Projects that allow me to look within myself, find the problems, and attempt to fix them.  I will attempt to use this space as a place work out those problems.  

In 10 weeks, I have friends getting married.  I haven't known them for a super long time, but long enough to know that they are great people and I can't wait for them to start their lives together.  I am making a quilt for them as their wedding gift.  This quilt isn't particularly difficult to make, but it is a little time consuming and good for thinking.  As I work on this quilt, I will hopefully find a little peace.  By the end, maybe I'll have a few answers.  

And maybe, just maybe, for the first time in my life, I will finish something I start.